gyrating bhtch

Session:

Captain Flywheel and the Produce Section (live)

login

Home

Sessions

Bhtches

Stories

Photos

Videos

Search

Goiter Man
When I worked at the circus, you see
Outside the tents and the rings three
I was the attraction that brought the crowds
Come rain or shine, sun or clouds

I was the headliner of the sideshow
They'd come for miles to see my throat
I was the Goiter Man, but now I'm Neal
My checkered past, I can no longer conceal

As Goiter Man, I ruled the freaks
The crazies, the wierdos, and the geeks
I nurtured my goiter both night and day
Avoided iodine in every way

I was the headliner of the sideshow
They'd come for miles to see my throat
But one day, the crowd greeted me with jeers
Threw veggies at my eyes, nose and ears

Someone slipped me iodine, it changed my physique
My goiter went away within the space of a week
Lichme the Clown, though he wouldn't tell us
Or the bearded lady, who'd become quite jealous

I was the headliner of the sideshow
They'd come for miles to see my throat
So I dedicated the rest of my life
To put all vegetables under the knife

I've made a decision I'd like to announce
I'm closing my grocery store for good
For in its place, you will find
The best appliance store in the hood

Mindy, my dear, I'll ask for your aid
Please manage my store, as that is your trade
Horace, I'd love to, your idea it's grand
With your fix-it skills, we'll be in demand

I've made a decision I'd like to announce
I'm closing my grocery store for ever and ever
But I need someone to buy and to sell
Someone who is bright, quick and clever

We've a better salesmen than Ron Popeil
Who better to sell than our friend Neal?
You respect my skills, so I'll join your shop
I no longer feel disdain for your crop

I've made a decision I'd like to announce
I'm closing my grocery, bringing it to a stop
And my Flywheel costume, it will be hung
In the front window of my shop

And for my cellulose friends, I will make
A refrigerator door that's clear, not opaque
They'll stay on display inside the store
So they'll be preserve forevermore

Some years later, Horace's aunt came to pay him an unexpected visit. Seeing the wondrous vegetables, and the opportunity to further surprise Horace, she made a healthy batch of ratatouille. Neal went back for seconds...
Copyright 1991-2017 Gyrating Bhtch. All Rights Reserved. Webmaster

song length: 00:05:45

song rating: 5.00

Play Song in Browser


Grandpa very proud