Merry Christmas Bhtch - Gyrating Bhtch

It was December 25th, about a year ago
When we all got together, to do a show
The air was frigid on that fateful eve
But we made our music, which was completely naive
Now it's one year later; a reunion of sorts
But we're still not on radio with Eddie Schwartz
We've been playin' a year; haven't lost the itch
So Merry Christmas...Bhtch!!

We've traded members, and we've traded spit
But through it all, Brud still has no kit
We're the knights in shining armor of your stereo system
We're the coolest band in all of Christendom
We've got a wall of sound coming out of the speakers
When people hear us, they say "jeepers!"
Sometimes we dance--call it a nervous twitch
Well Merry Christmas...Bhtch!!

Well Merry Christmas, Bhtch
You'll never make us rich
Hope you have a Merry Christmas
A Merry Christmas Bhtch
Well Merry Christmas Bhtch
You'll never make us rich
Hope you have a Merry Christmas
A Merry Christmas...Bhtch!!

We hope to be around for at least a year
To once again bring you our Yuletide cheer
We'll try to be your musical Santa
And on January one, we'll be your Mylanta
So stuff your stockings with our songs of joy
And watch the faces light up on every girl and boy
Our seasonal tunes have their own little niche
And Merry Christmas...Bhtch!!!